GRIEVING THE PAST!

Another name change,  I'm retired, I get to do things like that.  

 When I retired, I went through a grieving process. I’m told that it’s common to grieve the job you are no longer part of, especially if you loved your job.  And I loved my job! It's not like the grief of losing a spouse or a child but it is grief nonetheless.

I love the company I worked for. My boss was wonderful, as were my coworkers. I loved my tiny office and I loved helping people find what works for them and their pets.
I worked for a dog activity center where everyone there was concerned about the dogs and cats that we had in our care.  Yes, we board cats there as well.
It was common to hear staff talking among themselves about how to make this dog more comfortable or how to ease that cats stay.
It was an everyday thing to see staff showing off pictures of dogs that they took with their phones to share with the owners. It was also common for staff to carry small dogs in their pockets or slings to keep them warm or just to keep to keep them close. There was usually a dog at the front reception desk to help greet customers as they came in.
When you work with such great people, water cooler topics are everything from the dogs in their care to what the staff did over the weekend with their own dogs. Meetings were always about the pets. Remodeling was always designed with the pets in mind. Phone calls were about how to make the lives of pets and their owners better.
I miss that. I like being a part of that. I still use the present tense when I talk about them. I have to correct myself when I start to talk about the great people I worked with.  It was hard to leave but it was needed.
So there is a grieving process. I guess grieving is different for everyone and for each person the time spent in each stage is different. I am still a work in progress but here are the stages:

         1. Denial: “I never really wanted to retire… I should still be working”.  I knew I                    was going to retire. I knew it was coming. I really didn’t stay here long.

       2.  Anger: “They made me retire… They wanted me out of there... So-and-so set me up”. I was not angry at anyone. I retired because I couldn’t do the job and I needed to concentrate on my health. 

      3.  Bargaining: “Maybe if I just _________, I could go back (or move on)”. I remember this stage and trying so hard to get back to where I wanted to be so I could stay at work. It wasn’t working. I needed to concentrate on my health. 

      4.  Depression: “Who am I kidding, I’m worthless and always was”. I had to learn to relay on God and learn that I have other skills. I’m learning to use them to help others. I’m creating a new schedule. 

      5.   Acceptance: “I felt lost at first, but now I finally feel at peace with my new life”. I’m a work in progress. I find retirement enjoyable and especially as Spring is getting closer. I’m looking forward to getting outside and watching plants grow. 

So for those of you who have retired, did you go through these stages? Did you know you were going through grief at the time? How about those of you getting ready to retire, do you know about this grief I am talking about? Talk to me.