Summer Hodgepodge.

Thank you Joyce for these questions,  I needed a reason to blog. 

1. What has been the highlight of your summer so far? (It's still summer people!)
Spending time with Hubby always makes me smile, going to the beach was certainly the highlight for me.  It was not very busy and the day was beautiful.  

2. What do you wish you'd done more of this summer? Less of?
I wish I had blogged more.  I didn't think people would want to know all about doctor's appointments or treatment updates which was most of the summer so I didn't blog about it.  What I wish I had done less of?  Have so many doctor's appointments and treatments. 

3. Something you're looking forward to on your September calendar?
We got the Ok to travel for the first time in over 3 years, so we are hoping to do just that.  Friday we are going on a whale watch which is not so much traveling as it is "getting out of the house" But I hope we get to go to Canada at some point this year.  

4. Best/favorite book you've read this summer?
A Touch of Deceit by Gary Ponzo.  I like mysteries and this was fun to read.

5. Share something positive, encouraging, or uplifting here.
Hubby and I are enjoying the start of school.  We don't have kids in schools but now that school is back in session, the lines are shorter, there are no overtired children in restaurants and we can travel!  We are looking forwarded to some day trips and some away trips.  That's so exciting for us, to get away and not worry about where the nearest hospital is or if the doctors there know about the meds I'm on and what to do in case of an emergency.  

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Summer may be unofficially over but the weather is still very warm (ok, some call it hot as in it's high 80's-low 90's)! I love it.  I hope it continues for a few more months before it gets cold because up here, it's cold for a long time!!!  

Catching Up

Good Morning,

Usually on Wednesday there is a Wednesday Hodgepodge from Joyce over at "From This Side of the Pond." Joyce is taking some well deserved time off.  You know letting life happen and being able to enjoy it and be present for it.  I'm so happy for her and proud that she recognizes that she needs to take time off.

It gives me an opporunity to play cahch up with all of you.

We are enjoying retirement and being able to make plans, change plans and do other stuff instead without feeling one bit upset about that.  We nap when we want to, eat when and what we want to,  and play at whatever we want to.  God is so good, allowing us this time together.

My health holds steady.  I'm on a new treatment that has "Death" listed as a possible side effect which was a bit scary at first, but 5 weeks into the new treatment, I'm still standing and feeling good.  There are heavy steroids involved which stay in my body for 36 hours so I have a "steroid high" for a solid day and half.  I'll take that over Death, any day!!  I still have good days and bad days but thanks to God, I've been blessed with more good days.  I feel so many prayers going up to God on our behalf.  To say that this treatment is a breeze would not be true, however, I'm holding up pretty well compared to others who are on this same regimen.

Our grandgirls are a blast to be around! They makes us feel both young and tired at the same time.  Our daughter and son-in-law are fantastic parents and have raised great girls.  We love having them around and are so happy that we get to watch them.  It both helps out our daughter and son-in-law with work schedules and allows us to play with them for a few hours a week.

Divine

August

Our Littles are still little and one of them, Divine, loves this summer  heat -which we are having a lot of - while August is like Hubby and looking for cool spots to wait this heat out.  AC is his best friend at the moment.

We are having a heat/rain wave.  It seams that it is either really hot or really wet!  We've had several days of downpours (glad we live on a mountain) and then it's just hot and muggy.  I love it but  no one else seems to.  Winter is long and cold up here in New Hampshire so when summer finally shows up, I take full pleasure in it.

Well, I guess that's me in a nut shell.  We are here, we are blessed, we are happy and happily retired.  
How are you doing?

Thank you once again Joyce for such great questions.  Here are my answers, give me yours. 

1. What's something in your house you'd like to get rid of but can't?

I would love to get rid of our windows.  They are old, tired, and I'm sure leak lots of cold air in the winter, which I hate.  Cost is the issue however.  We are not handy in those things so the cost would include not only the windows, but installing them. Oh well!!!!

2. When is the last time you experienced a sense of nostalgia? Elaborate.

This last weekend, we had the pleasure of having our grandgirls over for the night.  It was so wonderful seeing how sweet they are and how they are growing.  Our daughter is a wonderful mother and watching her with her girls brings tears to my eyes and swells my heart with pride.  


3. You're only allowed three apps on your smart phone or tablet...which three do you keep?

My Bible of course, so that I can have God's word with me always.  FB so that I can keep up with all the people I love, and Messages because I text more than I call these days.  


4. July 11th is National Blueberry Muffin Day. Who knew? Do you like blueberry muffins? If you were going to have a muffin would blueberry be your choice? What's the last thing you baked?

I do like blueberry muffins and that is my go to muffin when we do get muffins.  There are others that I like, Apple, Cinnamon and also Carrot.  But Blueberry is the one I order most.  The last thing that I baked was a long time ago when it was cool enough to turn on the oven.  I'm going to say that it was American Chop Suey.  

5. What's the biggest way you've changed since you were a child? In what way are you still the same?

WOW! This is a tough question! It's been a long time since I was a child. I would say that I am more confident now. I was very shy as a child (I sturttered when I spoke so I didn't talk much).  I am not so shy now.  I've embraced my being an introvert.  I am who I am and I am comfortable in my skin now.  
I still enjoy my own company.  I'm ok in a quiet house, or sitting in the back yard, or coloring in the morning.  
6. Insert your own random thought here.

We just had our president nominate a new Supreme Court Justince.  I hope and pray that he is passed through the process quickly and can start his new job soon.  I sometimes hear those other people complaining and whining about how they already don't like him (some complained even before he was nominated.)  They sound like a 2 years old having a temper tantrum! I want to put them in a time out in a corner untill they they grow up a bit.   Seems like they all want us to be tolerant of everyone and everything but only if it agrees with what they are tolerant of.  Too bad, I have my own mind and I will not be bullied by a 2 year old!  Have a great week everyone.  

Last Day of Spring Hodgepodge

1. Summer is upon us this week in the Northern hemisphere. Tell us three things on your summer bucket list.

1. Reclaim the grass!  Hubby has done the mowing for the past few years, which was wonderful of him to do since I couldn't but I love working on my lawn.  He didn't feed the lawn much and so over the past few years, the lawn looks neglected and now looks terrible!  Now that I'm feeling stronger, I have taken back the job of lawn care and am starting over to reclaim it and make it look FABULOUS!  It will be better next year because of all the work I'm going to put into it this year.  

2. Arcadia National Park in Maine!  I love this place and want badly to go back to it for a day, or better yet a weekend.  It's just beautiful up there.  

3. See more Baseball games.  We have a local team ( New Hampshire Fisher Cats) up here and the ballpark is nice.  We have gone to one game, but I would like to go a few more times for a Date Night.

2. Something fun you used to do as a kid in the summertime?

There was a local pond that we could walk to and go swimming.  There was a life guard on duty of course and a place where you could change your clothes and get a hot dog, chips and even ice cream if you wanted.  My girl friend, Sue, and I would walk down, spend the entire day (without adult supervision) and stop on the way back to get a soft serve ice cream from the small stand on the walk home.  It took us just a few minutes to walk there and back and we stayed the entire day.  Both of us were blond, light skinned girls so we never tanned - we burned - but loved swimming all day.  

3. Rooftop or backyard? Why?

 I can't remember ever going to a rooftop party but have been to lots of backyard parties.  I love being at those.  It gave me a chance to sit in the sun, visit others and even stick my feet in the kiddy pool to cool off.  I guess I could do that on a rooftop party but something about walking barefoot on the grass is just so soothing to the soul. 

4. Do you read food labels? Place importance on them? Make an effort to find out/care about where your food comes from?

For foods that I always get all the time, no, I don't look at the label.  But new things? Oh Yes I do!!  I need to know what I'm putting in my body for lots of reasons but mixing "things" I can't pronounce and Chemo drugs can be a real probblem so I look at labels.  In this day and age, knowing what is going into my body is very improtant.

5. A song you'll have on repeat this summer?

Well one song will not do.  It's the whole album!  ABBA!  Need I say more? Why yes, yes I do, It's not Summer without the Beach Boys!  So these 2 play over and over all summer, and fall!
 
6. Insert your own random thought here.


My mind is full of random thoughts today so here is part of the list running through my head today - and of course it's all the same time:
- This is week 2 of a new very strong Chemo infusion.  Last week went great and this week should be the same.  
- Did I put the lawn mower away after I mowed yesterday? - why can't I remember?
- That apple muffin was good, haven't had an apple muffin in a very long time.
- Boy, poor Hubby is going to have a long day today as this infusion takes a long time and he is just sitting here all day with me.
- A year ago I was back to work for a few hours each day, this year I am no longer working and sitting here getting premeds to protect me from the drug that I will get in about an hour.
There's more, but you get the point.  My poor head!!

A Hodgepodge of a Hodgepodge!

Good Morning all!  I hope you are enjoying the beautiful day we are having and enjoying the questions Joyce has for us today.  Come join us as we answer them.

1. What happens to the mail at your house?

Most of it goes right into the trash.  It's just junk after all.  I'm tempted to send it back by marking "Return to Sender" and having the company pay for postage for both directions but I don't.  That seems to just take too much time to do that.  

2. Something you always splurge on? Any guilt associated with the splurge?

I don't splurge on much, I'm pretty simple but I do like Jiff peanut butter and that is the brand that I spend money on.  I know that there are other brands that are more healthy but I like Jiff, so I buy that.  I feel no guilt at all.  

3. There are many, but what are two important questions you think every bride and groom should ask/answer before they plan their walk down the aisle?

WOW, after being married for so long it's hard to remember what we should have talked about before  we got married but I think the conversation about children (do you both want them and how many, how far apart, who will stay home with them or are you both going to work and have a sitter or use a daycare etc) and plans about where to live (which state, near parents or not, house, apartment, condo, etc) are the questions they should talk about.  I know that is most likely more than 2 questions, but really, important  questions.  

4. What's the best advice your father ever gave you?

Swing as high as you can on the swing but make sure you can jump off safely if you need to.  

5. Your favorite movie where a father features heavily in the storyline?

3 Men and Baby.   

These 3 men who know nothing about babies learn to raise one and learn to love someone else beside themselves.  Babies don't come with directions after all do they. 

 
6. Insert your own random thought here.

I was out with some friends on Tuesday and as always we were sharing some of our past.  I discovered that I am surrounded by very strong, determined, brave women who have faced tough times or are currently facing tough times but they do it with laughter, a smile, conviction to do the right thing, and a strong belief in a God who loves them and cares for them.  I can learn a lot from my friends.  I love my friends.  I hope you all love yours.  Have a great week.  

Mow over Hodgepodge!

Thank you Joyce for the questions, here are my answers.  

1. Describe your 30's in one sentence. If you're not yet 30 tell us one thing you hope to accomplish once you hit that particular decade.

The best of times.  

2. Is it harder for you to exercise or eat healthy?

Exercise, for sure.  

3. June 7th is National VCR Day. Huh? Anyway this reminded me of something I saw on Facebook listing household items we no longer have and the VCR was on it. I couldn't put my hands on that list, but found another list here of 21 items we all had ten years ago, but which are now obsolete-

bookshelves (WHAT!!???), drip coffee makers, alarm clocks, file cabinets, desktop computers, printers, printed phone books, answering machines, fax machines, paper shredders, a Rolodex, CD racks, CD burners, china cabinets, home phones, entertainment consoles, DVD players, calculators, takeout menus, incandescent light bulbs, and cable TV

Your thoughts? How many on the list do you still have? Still use?

Bookshelves?  Yes we have lots as we have lots of books. 
Drip coffee maker?  Not any more.
Alarm Clocks? Yes we have 2 old ones in our offices to keep track of the time.  
File Cabinets?  Yes, Where else do you keep the manuals of all the things we buy. 
Desktop computers? Yes, Hubby likes the really big monitor.
Printers? Yes.
Printed phone books? Every fall the town sends us a new one, I'm always surprised to see how small it is and it covers a few towns around us.  
Answering Machine? There is one attached to our land line so yes. 
Fax machine? Our printer is a fax machine as well,  I can't figure out how to use it so yes we have one but we don't use it.  Most things can be set via email right? 
Paper Shredder? Yup, still have one and still use it.
Roledx,CD racks,CD burner, China Cabinet? Nope, none 
Home phone? Yup still have it but most people call our cell.
Entertainment consoles? No. 
DVD player, calculators? Yup, still have them.
Take out menus?  Yes but we don't use them as much as we use to.  We use on line ordering most of the times.
Incandescent light bulbs? I think we still have some in the house.
Cable?  Yup we still have it. 

4. What's something you see disappearing in the next ten years?

Keys, both car and house. It will all be some sort of scanner.

5. How did you celebrate your birthday this past year? Is that typical?

I celebrated my birthday with a beautiful card, a nice meal for both breakfast and dinner, (no cooking and no clean up) a sweet card and the day to play in the yard. No one to bug me. Our children called me to sing Happy Birthday over the phone and talk for a bit about life.  It was lovely and yes, that is the typical day for me.  I love the ease of being home and and it's quiet and I can play in the yard, in the dirt.  

6. Insert your own random thought here.

I love to mow the lawn, I love the smell of freshly cut grass, the different patterns that I can put in the lawn, the peace of no one interupting me for something.  For the past few  years, I've not been able to mow and so Hubby has been doing it.  He doesn't like to mow but did it for me every month without grumbling for a few years.  He loves me.  I tried to mow a few weeks ago but the pull cord was too hard for me to pull and the mower was a bit too heavy to push. 
Imagine my joy when Hubby got me a new electric mower!!  I love my little green machine.  It starts with a push of a buton, it pushes easily, has 5 different heights to pick from and is a lot more quiet than the gas model.  I can get out to mow at 6 am if I want and not disturb the neighbors. 
I am such a happy girl! I can walk and mow and pray again.   Have a nice week everyone. 

The Official Start of Summer is Here Hodgepodge.

These questions always make me think which is something that really takes time.  Thank you Joyce. 

1. The last place you visited/patronized where you felt like you were given 'the royal treatment'?

This is easy.  Last Sunday Hubby brought home flowers for me.  I'd been grounded for a week and couldn't go to worship.  I love going to worship, and singing with all my "brothers and sisters." The sound is so beautiful.  The sermon is always so meaningful.  I was pretty sad about being stuck in the house with no one but the Littles to hang with.  The flowers really picked me up.

2. The last task you completed that was a 'royal pain'?

WOW this one is hard because there is really nothing that I can think of that is a real 'royal pain' to do.  I guess paying bills.  It's a necessary evil I guess. 

3. How have your strengths helped you succeed? How have your faults hindered you?

Living with cancer can really create times of depression, but I refuse to go there. I keep looking for the things that I can still do and really try to not think about the things that I can no longer do.  

As for my faults, I tend to go to the dark side of things fast.  Example: I have a doctor's appointment Friday with one of my oncologists and my mind wants to think "Oh No! We're out of options and he is going to tell me that I'm out of time?"  See...the dark side!  I really have to yell at myself and say "NO! He's going to me tell me what the new plan is and that it will all be OK.  That I'm strong enough to tackle this."  

4. If you found a remote that could rewind, fast forward, stop and start time, what would you do with it?

Well it sure wouldn't be 'fast forward'!  Time goes by too fast as it is. I'm sure not going to help it along.  I think I would like to rewind and relive some of the great times we had when our kids were little but I wonder if I would still make the same mistakes.  Maybe I'd just toss the remote because I'm not sure you can relive the past without changing it which would change the present. I like the present. 


5. Any special plans for the Memorial Day weekend? Will you in some way honor or recognize the meaning of this day (remembering people who died in service to their country)? Have you ever been to Arlington National Cemetery? Does your town do anything special to mark the day?

 We will most likely lay low.  Nothing special although I would like to go the beach and walk around if the weather is nice.  I've not been to Arlington National Cemetery but it's on my bucket list.  Our town does have a cute parade which is always fun.  Of course there will be tv movies about WWII that we will most likely watch and remember.  My dad was not in the military but my Father-In-Law was. So we will watch and thank all of the military for their sacrifice. 

6.  Insert your own random thought here.

Well my white count came up so thank you all for the many prayers.  I still can't start Chemo however, because in the 3 weeks we waited for the white count to grow, the cancer grew very fast.  So on Friday, we see my oncologist to create a new plan.  Not sure what that plan will be, but we'll talk.  
There is a shingles vaccine that is a dead vaccine and one that my primary care doctor said I can have.  So we are going to talk about that with our oncologist and see if I can get it.  It will mean that I can stop taking the pill that I now take 2x a day to prevent getting the shingles!  That is huge!  I can now stop taking the drug to lower my cholesterol as it is down.  I love not having to take so many drugs.

Happy Memorial Day to you all and Thank you to all those who have served in the past and continue to serve today.  

Spring has Sprung Hodgepodge

I'm joining Joyce again for this weeks Hodgepodge questions.  She comes up with them, we answer them.  Can't get much easier than that!

1. They say you learn something new every day. What did you learn yesterday?
I learned that Hubby had a fun childhood. I always knew that but hearing some of the places he played as a child was fun.  Even after 45 years, I'm still leaning things about him.

2. Have you ever had a now or never moment? Elaborate.
Sometimes on Facebook I'll see an amusement park ride with the caption "Would you?"  It usually involves a whole lot  of elevation and some spinning, twirling, falling sort of contraption that you are locked into.  There is no way I'm doing that!! So that is a definite NEVER moment.  But traveling, or time spent with the grands is a NOW moment.  

3.  April 25th is National Telephone Day. Do you still have a land line or have you gone mobile only? When you receive a text message do you respond immediately? Last time you turned your phone off?  In two or three sentences share with us a story/memory/incident from your childhood (or something current if that's too hard) where the telephone is featured.

We have a land line but rarely use it. Mostly we use it for the caller ID function.  If we don't know the caller, we don't answer the phone.  I'm so sick of the robo calls.  I guess the Do Not Call function that we signed up for does absolutely nothing.
I don't always respond to a text message right away, it depends on the text.  Some are about what the other person did for supper or what their dog is wearing that is cute or funny.  Those types of text can wait.  My phone goes off every night and when I'm at church.  It only rings if someone on the VIP (very important person) list calls me.  Everyone else goes to voice mail till I'm awake.
Growing up we had a "Party line" where 3 of us were on the same line and you could listen in to others if you were so inclined. If you needed the phone for an emergency you needed to first get the others off the phone and then you could call for the emergency.


4. Close call, at someone's beck and call, call the shots, call a meeting, call it quits, call in sick, call on the carpet, wake up call...which call have you 'heard' recently? Explain.
Call it quits fits me this week.  I quit trying to gain weight -yes I'm one of those who is underweight - don't hate me, it really is an issue. I quit running around trying to get so much done in one day. I quit getting the yard raked and ready for spring in one week.  I just plain quit.

5. What subject do you wish you'd paid more attention to in school?

Math.  Especially the type of math used to figure out long term finances.  Do we have enough to live on, how do we get more, how can we invest better - that sort of thing.  It would have been much easier to learn those skills then, it's harder when we get older (well for me at least)

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Spring has finally shown up in the Northeast.  I'm so happy to sit outside and watch the traffic go by with a nice cup of tea and have the sun shine on me.  The yard will still be there tomorrow to work on.

The Sun Came Out on Hodgepodge Day!

Welcome to the Hodgepodge.  Joyce creates the questions, we answer them.  Come join us for fun. 

1. Three things on your spring bucket list? If you don't have an actual list that's fine, pretend you do.

My spring bucket list is : Garden,  Rake, and Visit the beach with the Hubby and the Littles (the dogs) 

2. Where do you find rest? What restores your soul? When was the last time you did whatever it was you answered here?

I find rest at home. It's quiet here and it's loving here, and Hubby is here.  That gives me rest.  Home also stores my soul.  I can do my Bible reading here and reflect on all my many blessings. 

3. April is National Celery Month. Who knew? Do you like celery? What's your favorite dish made with celery? On a veggie and dip platter which would you reach for first-carrot sticks, celery sticks, cucumbers or cherry tomatoes? 

I do like celery but mostly in soups and stews.  If it's in the veggie platter, it will not be the first thing I take, peppers will be.  

4. I read here eight things to do before 8 am to make your day less hectic-Start one load of laundry, drink water, empty the dishwasher, read your Bible, know what you're having for dinner, get dressed, brain dump (two lists-one what you're thankful for and one what's weighing on your mind), and after the brain dump make your to-list for the day

My list is for the day, it's not a list to get done before 8am.  I'm retired and have all day to get it done! 

My to do list for today is: 1-Get dressed, 2-read my Bible, 3-feed the Littles (dogs), 4-get Littles to doggie daycare, 5-start a load of wash, 6-take a nap, 7- Be thankful for my health, 8-make sure I am ready for another medical test on Thursday.

5. Describe the view from your window.

A picture is worth a thousands words.  I love living in the country.

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Barbara Bush has left this earth and she leaves behind a story of love, caring, determination, and standing by her husband.  The news has been all good about her and her love of her husband and children.  She was looking forward to seeing her daughter who had died many years ago of cancer.  I hope she got her wish.  Rest in Peace Barbara and may peace also surround your family.  

Grooming the Littles

We have 2 small dogs. August Rush and Divine Tuppance.  Both are Chinese Crested, August Rush is a Powder Puff (he has hair that if left alone will grown allmost all the way to the floor) and Divine Tuppance is what is called a Hairy Hairless (she has hair on her head, tail and feet but that is all.)  They are know as "the Littles" and "the Bugs."  August is often called "Dead Bug" because when you tell him it's time to get groomed, he rolls over on his back, sticks out his tongue and closes his eyes.  He plays dead!!  Divine is called "Little Bug" because she is just so small and loves to cuddle.  However, because they both have hair, they both need grooming so I have a grooming station that is set up in our dinning room.

The set up is a small folding table and a white plastice storage cabinet.  Since it's adjacent to the kitchen, they get their baths in the sink and then we walk over to the table to finish the grooming.  

Another view of the grooming station.  It's really a nice set up albeit small.  You use what you have, right? The white plastic storage cabinet really holds a lot of extra brushes, combs, shampoo, rinse, ear cleaners, and lots of other stuff.  

The top holds the combs, brushes and spray that I will use daily to brush them out before they head off to daycare.  There is also a small bath rug to lay on and underneath it is a mat to hold the rug in place.  The bottom of the grooming arm also helps to hold the rug down.  

I am looking for a lamp to add for added light and I though a clip on light would be perfect to add light and also to continue to hold down the rug,  plus it wouldn't take up valuable table top space, but I'm not sure that the clamp would go over both the run and the table top.  So I may end up with a table lamp after all.  Oh well, at the moment I can do without it.  

Both Little's have agreed that this new set up is not a good idea for them as it's just to easy to grab a dog without warning and plop them on the table and begin grooming them.  Before, I had to set it up and then take it down as the table was in the middle of the kitchen serving as an Island.  I love it, them not so much.

Do you groom your own dogs or do they go to a groomer?  

P.S. Hubby read my post and decided to solve my problem of the light.  What do you think of his solution?  I love it and he is my hero for being a Hubby/Protector and Problem solver.

Transitions

This is our front yard at the moment, part winter and part spring. If you enlarge the photo, you can see both snow and plants popping up on brown dirt.  This is the perfect photo of my life at the moment.  Part in the past, my mind becomes filled with the memories of working outside of the home with lots of things to do after work - and part in the present, retired, easy going, trying to find my way with the talents and gifts that I have been given by God.  

There have been lots of transitions in my life, after all Hubby was in the Air Force for 8 years and we moved a lot.  Then of course we had children with all the after school business that comes with kids.  Add a full time job, church functions, friends, moving a few more times and don't get me started on the aging process and what surprises cancer drops on a person and there have been a lot of transitions.  With each change, with each transition, Hubby and I took it one day at a time.  This retirement transition is the same thing.  

Are you in transition? How is your transition going?  What is your transition?  Don't panic, just take it one day at a time and remember that you have had other transitions in your life.  So far you have overcome them all.  That's a great record!! 

Have a great day!

GRIEVING THE PAST!

Another name change,  I'm retired, I get to do things like that.  

 When I retired, I went through a grieving process. I’m told that it’s common to grieve the job you are no longer part of, especially if you loved your job.  And I loved my job! It's not like the grief of losing a spouse or a child but it is grief nonetheless.

I love the company I worked for. My boss was wonderful, as were my coworkers. I loved my tiny office and I loved helping people find what works for them and their pets.
I worked for a dog activity center where everyone there was concerned about the dogs and cats that we had in our care.  Yes, we board cats there as well.
It was common to hear staff talking among themselves about how to make this dog more comfortable or how to ease that cats stay.
It was an everyday thing to see staff showing off pictures of dogs that they took with their phones to share with the owners. It was also common for staff to carry small dogs in their pockets or slings to keep them warm or just to keep to keep them close. There was usually a dog at the front reception desk to help greet customers as they came in.
When you work with such great people, water cooler topics are everything from the dogs in their care to what the staff did over the weekend with their own dogs. Meetings were always about the pets. Remodeling was always designed with the pets in mind. Phone calls were about how to make the lives of pets and their owners better.
I miss that. I like being a part of that. I still use the present tense when I talk about them. I have to correct myself when I start to talk about the great people I worked with.  It was hard to leave but it was needed.
So there is a grieving process. I guess grieving is different for everyone and for each person the time spent in each stage is different. I am still a work in progress but here are the stages:

         1. Denial: “I never really wanted to retire… I should still be working”.  I knew I                    was going to retire. I knew it was coming. I really didn’t stay here long.

       2.  Anger: “They made me retire… They wanted me out of there... So-and-so set me up”. I was not angry at anyone. I retired because I couldn’t do the job and I needed to concentrate on my health. 

      3.  Bargaining: “Maybe if I just _________, I could go back (or move on)”. I remember this stage and trying so hard to get back to where I wanted to be so I could stay at work. It wasn’t working. I needed to concentrate on my health. 

      4.  Depression: “Who am I kidding, I’m worthless and always was”. I had to learn to relay on God and learn that I have other skills. I’m learning to use them to help others. I’m creating a new schedule. 

      5.   Acceptance: “I felt lost at first, but now I finally feel at peace with my new life”. I’m a work in progress. I find retirement enjoyable and especially as Spring is getting closer. I’m looking forward to getting outside and watching plants grow. 

So for those of you who have retired, did you go through these stages? Did you know you were going through grief at the time? How about those of you getting ready to retire, do you know about this grief I am talking about? Talk to me.